Give Him to Me

“Give him to me!” the doctor instructed me the night when my one-year-old son had a fever seizure.

Crying, confused and fearing the worst, I replied to the doctor, “No, he is safer here with me.” Somehow and without any understanding, the fear made me believe that while my son was in my arms, nothing bad could happen to him. Why trust the hands of the doctor, when I was his mother and there was no better place for him to be than in my loving and protective arms? Finally, when I realized that there was nothing I could do to save him, I gave up and handed my son into the doctor’s hands.

I never thought that fifteen years after that incident, God and I would be having the same conversation about my only child, “Give him to me! Trust your son to Me.” The difference this time was that it was not a simple fever seizure and it was not the doctor who was asking me for my son.

This time it was a matter of life or death that was an almost daily battle in my home, and it was God Himself who was asking for my son.

In the meantime, the Lord began taking me on a faith walk where I would learn to trust Him. At the end of 2014, a friend of mine sent me a Christmas present, the book When Moms Pray Together. Though I was grateful for the book, I did not take the time to read it. A year later my son was admitted, for the first time, to a mental health institution.

Devastated and feeling hopeless, I was in need of hearing God’s voice and perspective, so I prayed one more time. Next to my bed, I noticed the unopened book.

The stories I read that night in the book were all about the miracles God had performed in many lives as a result of mothers who faithfully prayed together for their children.

The Lord was instructing me on how to fight this fight in prayer for my son’s life.

Soon everyone I knew was praying for him, and changes started to take place. God was working in my son’s favor.

Even when good things were happening, and apparently my son was getting better, God guided me to discover my son’s plan to take his own life. It seemed he was not making any progress. “Why God? Why is he not getting any better?” Lovingly and reassuringly, God spoke to my heart, “You don’t have to approve My ways; you just have to trust Me.”

Trusting God with my only son! That was too much for me to take. “No Lord, I can’t give him to you. Please don’t ask me to do that.”

But the Holy Spirit’s gentle voice prevailed, and I cried out, “Lord, you know my heart, you know how much I love him, and you know how hard it is for me to give him to you.”

“Father, I hand him over to you. Even if You don’t ever heal him, and even if you decide to take him from me, I will trust you.”

Needless to say, that was the most difficult and painful prayer I have ever prayed, but the Lord be praised, it was after that prayer that my son started to heal.

A few short months later, I went to meet a friend at a church for a retreat we were planning. My friend was not there yet, so I went inside the church alone. To my surprise, a Moms in Prayer presentation was about to start. A woman invited me in. In the entry way was a banner about Moms in Prayer. I looked at the banner, glanced at some literature and said, “Oh well, why not. Prayer is one of my favorite things.”

During the meeting, I remembered the book I read the year prior, and how similar this ministry was to the book. To my surprise, it was the same ministry! I sat next to this kind and loving Hispanic lady and she was praying to God to bring another Hispanic mom to join her group. And there I was, listening to her and thinking, “I am that mom you are praying for!”

Since I began praying weekly in Moms in Prayer I have seen God’s protective hand guarding my son. I have also learned about praying more strategically and effectively, by praying the Word of God.

After joining the group, the Lord gave me the Scripture Psalm 23 and told me to pray this over my son’s life, specifically verses 4 through 6: “Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me. You prepare a feast for me in the presence of my enemies. You honor me by anointing my head with oil. My cup overflows with blessings. Surely your goodness and unfailing love will pursue me all the days of my life, and I will live in the house of the Lord forever.”

I know with all my heart that God’s unfailing love will pursue my son, and until the day when love wins his heart, I will continue to pray.

Are you praying for a prodigal son or daughter? Find resources, encouragement, videos and more at Moms Praying for Prodigals.

Millie Serrano is passionate about the Lord. Currently she serves as program coordinator at MUTUAL Girls Club in Bartlesville, Oklahoma (a local women’s ministry). She is also a member of the Oklahoma Moms in Prayer State Team. Through Moms in Prayer, Millie learned how to pray more strategically, according to the Word of God. Millie loves being a mom. She is still praying, waiting patiently and trusting God to bring her prodigal back to Him.